of self

affliction, anguish, annoyance, apologies, bitterness, care, compunction, concern, conscience, contrition, demur, disappointment, discomfort, dissatisfaction, dole, grief, heartache, heartbreak, lamentation, misgiving, nostalgia, pang, penitence, qualm, regretfulness, remorse, repentance, ruefulness, scruple, self-accusation, self-condemnation, self-disgust, self-reproach, sorrow, uneasiness, woe, worry


Regret is an sad word.
I'd like to say I don't have any,
But I have many...
And I feel helpless to fix them.

This is a week of self-reflection for me.
I'm such a person of pattern, of habit, of familiarity, and of regret.
My priorities are mixed up.
I need to seriously consider what is important to me, what is good for me, and what I really just need to get over.
And for the first time in a long time, I actually have time to really consider...myself.
No summer homework, no school, no endless to do list.
I'm free.

Today I sat in a chair at the christian book store for an hour pouring over potential books for the new college group at my church.
However, I left the store by "chance", with a graduates bible.
I had been meaning to buy a small bible with a closure that I could keep in my purse for sometime now...but I didn't get around to it until now.
I looked through all the bibles and the only one I could find that fit my financial needs ($20) with my specifications was the graduates bible. It also happens to be a Holman Christian Standard Bible, which is the same translation as the apologetics study bible I bought a year or so ago (which I really like).

All this to say, I need to take full advantage of the time and material God is giving me.

I am reminded of Philippians 4:6-8 - "⁶Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ⁸Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. "
I know these verses, but my application is mediocre at best.

I begin a new phase of life today and I want to make the most of it.
So here's to a life of purpose and contentment.


achievement, amends, amusement, atonement, bliss, cheerfulness, comfort, compensation, complacency, conciliation, contentedness, satisfaction, delight, ease, enjoyment, fulfillment, gladness, good fortune, gratification, happiness, indemnification, indulgence, joy, justice, peace of mind, pleasure, pride, propitiation, recompense, redress, refreshment, reimbursement, relief, reparation, repletion, resolution, reward, satiety, serenity, settlement, vindication, well-being

1 week mark.

It's one week until I graduate.
Finals start tomorrow.

I get out to my car after school and notice a slip on my windshield.

...I got a parking citation.
SEVEN days. how is that for bad luck?
And I've never gotten one before.
It's almost funny.